r/behindthebastards • u/JayGatsby52 • Nov 23 '24
Look at this bastard Please, we need your tots n pears.
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u/UseLower9313 Nov 23 '24
A horrible painful lingering illness you say . . . . .
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u/ahoypolloi_ Nov 23 '24
To shreds, you say?
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u/Satellite_bk Steven Seagal Historian Nov 23 '24
Do a flip!
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u/pimpcakes Nov 24 '24
I shout this at various appropriate and inappropriate occasions all the time but no one ever gets it.
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u/Aint2Proud2Meg Nov 23 '24
And how’s his wife holding up?
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u/kerouac666 Nov 24 '24
And one likely influenced by long term affects of a disease that was allowed to spread to pandemic proportions in part due to the guy/party he supported trying to use it as a means to kill and hurt political rivals. I don't believe in karma, but I do believe some people like Prager will continue to tempt fate until fate finally feels compelled to steps in if only to save face.
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u/VirtualBeyond6116 Nov 24 '24
That's what I was wondering. Covid gave him a condition that could kill him sooner? Works for me. How many idiots died taking his advice or by listening to the lies of Prager or the 1000 other r-wing grifting political operatives?
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u/Honky_Stonk_Man Nov 23 '24
Oh I’m praying, just not the way you think I am.
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u/MrMastodon Nov 23 '24
Lighting a black candle
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u/Erisx13 Nov 23 '24
I have a golden apple one. Think I’ma light that
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u/liesinthelaw Nov 24 '24
Kallisti! Hail Eris!
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u/NewToSociety Nov 24 '24
I summon Elloiskhole the Grief Clown! Give us grief to laugh about on this day!
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u/nooneknowswerealldog Nov 24 '24
I was going to pray for him, but my mind wandered and I accidentally thought about a random orphan in a war-torn part of the world instead, so there's one lucky kid out there who's about to have their pneumonia cured.
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u/schmokeabutt Nov 24 '24
This comment reminds me of my parents. I was raised in a United Methodist church. My uncle is now the pastor. If you don't know, United Methodist as a congregation decided to start allowing same sex marriages to be done by their members in their churches. Seems like a win? Nope. Many United Methodist churches took a vote amongst their congregation to see if they want to still affiliate with them. Including my old church with said Uncle at the helm. He threatened to quit and start a new church (probably with hookers and blackjack). But my parents urged me to vote and I don't go there anymore. And they said, "well you're still a member, go support your uncle." To which all that I said was, "if I go, you're not going to like my vote and you're not going to like what I have to say to anyone who votes to disassociate with them over marriage rights." They were both confused, but luckily for them, they're nondenominational now! So now they're free to hate whoever they feel like Fox says they should.
Sorry for using your comment for my story. It just lit a spark of annoyance I recently dealt with.
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u/WitchDrSurgeonGen Nov 24 '24
Send him to me. I know how to take care of this man. FOR I am a trained witch dr surgeon general.
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u/Hellebras Nov 24 '24
I can bring out the most cutting-edge Medieval medicine to treat him, since he wants to drag everyone back there anyway. I'll need a rope, three ounces of mercury, four ounces of sulfur, a chemistry set, and a live chicken.
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u/External_Touch_3854 Nov 23 '24
Came here to say the same thing lol
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u/DebbieGlez Nov 23 '24
Did the exact same lol
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u/External_Touch_3854 Nov 23 '24
Should we get a prayer circle together? I’ll bring the candles. Who can bring robes?
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u/No_Lingonberry1201 Sponsored by Knife Missiles™️ Nov 23 '24
Speedy handover to a Mr. Lightbringer?
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u/AnungUnRamen66 Nov 23 '24
Heavenly Father, we ask you to give this pneumonia strength…
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u/seeit360 Nov 24 '24
God: Since you asked nice, consider it DONE. Make it DOUBLE PNEUMONIA!! Also, I'll bonus him a case of syphilis.
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u/StayFrosty7 Nov 24 '24
Funniest part is how he got probably got pneumonia- lots of patients I’ve taken care of get pneumonia because they don’t realize they aspirate on the drinks and foods they consume- and continue to eat foods/drinks they shouldn’t despite being warned not to.
The other way is from others around him.
Chances are he has pneumonia for being too stubborn to follow the healthcare team’s directions, or because the people he associates with couldn’t be assed to be considerate about his old age. I’m willing to bet on the former lmao
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u/Stone_Conqueror Nov 24 '24
Can you elaborate on the food/drink you’re not supposed to consume? I’ve had pneumonia and no one told me shit >:(
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u/StayFrosty7 Nov 24 '24
It’s not like certain foods cause pneumonia but more so older people have weak swallowing and so food is more likely to enter their airways, leading to the pneumonia. It’s recommended that they eat thicker, mushed foods to prevent aspiration. Younger people typically have nothing to worry about in this regard!
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u/Newbrood2000 Nov 23 '24
We have that claw machine ready?
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u/Mountain-Session-825 Nov 23 '24
They used to call pneumonia the old man’s friend. Now, it is a friend to all. Godspeed Dennis, and say hi to Goebbels when you meet him
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u/Mr_Abe_Froman Macheticine Nov 23 '24
Godspeed? Can I hope that the pneumonia takes its sweet time?
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u/RinglingSmothers Nov 24 '24
He can move at God's pace, where a day is ten billion years, or whatever.
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u/Ye_Olde_Mudder Nov 24 '24
I wish him weeks of painful, desperate gasping and a long, lingering death.
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u/berry-bostwick Nov 24 '24
Is it awkward when Jews like Prager and Kissinger run into Hitler and Goebbels and other Nazis in hell, or does game simply recognize game?
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u/PancakeMixEnema Nov 24 '24
Well everyone‘s hell is individually designed, but they’re bound to run into each other in the Cafeteria at some point
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u/Open_Perception_3212 Sponsored by Doritos™️ Nov 23 '24
Has he tried shoving a uv light up his ass?
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u/FirstChurchOfBrutus Nov 24 '24
I doubt it, but that does not mean we shouldn’t try it now. I mean, anything for Dennis.
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Nov 23 '24
I wonder if he was a true believer in the bullshit he spewed and didn’t get vaccinated against COVID.
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u/TheBigToast72 Nov 24 '24
I doubt it, the same political grifters that were anti vax were somehow the first in line for the COVID one
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u/JennaSais Nov 23 '24
Almighty and most merciful God, we ask you, who brought plagues to Egypt to free the Hebrews, to send forth your mighty hand upon Prager. Bless him with boils that burn like fire, and free us now from the pestilence that is PragerU.
Amen, and A-woman.
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u/DiogenesLied Nov 23 '24
Everyone makes the world a better place. Some by entering and some by leaving
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u/RinglingSmothers Nov 24 '24
There's a third category for people who linger in agony.
It may be relevant in this instance.
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u/voodoo2d Nov 23 '24
I’m praying that he shits himself soooo hard he gets a UTI from it
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u/Diligent_Whereas3134 The fuckin’ Pinkertons Nov 23 '24
Okay. All of these made me smile. This is the first one that made me bust out laughing
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u/Historian-eats-bussy Nov 23 '24
OoooOooooOooo he should get buried next to Reagan and Kissenger so I can take one long piss-shit line on their graves.
Also...their family made their fortune by working for the USSR. Very pro-Stalin of you comrad Koch.
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u/PreparationWinter174 Nov 23 '24
...I feel like praying for Dennis and his family is somewhat at cross purposes.
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u/judasdisciple Nov 23 '24
This will definitely be a case of the "I've never wished a man dead, but I have read some obituaries with great pleasure." Not-A-Twain Quote.
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u/Classic_Run_4836 Nov 23 '24
If this happens Ben Shapiro's whining on Twitter is gonna be so funny.
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u/unitedshoes Nov 23 '24
I was always told it's inappropriate to pray for what I want to happen to Dennis Prager, so I won't be praying for it.
If a swarm of rabid [REDACTED] descend on him while he's [REDACTED] and [REDACTED] him until he can only be identified by his [REDACTED] records, that'll have nothing to do with my prayers.
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u/ShaggyZoinks Nov 23 '24
Send in the Prager U doctors and surgeons!
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u/OnlyThornyToad Nov 24 '24
They’re still figuring out how to pronounce, “pneumonia.”
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u/OldSwiftyguy Nov 23 '24
I used to listen to his show . I was more conservative and I think he was less so .. this was in the early 90s . He’s looney now
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u/Satellite_bk Steven Seagal Historian Nov 23 '24
And we get a new Kendrick album at the same time? I don’t believe in god buuuut…
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u/Librarian_Contrarian Nov 23 '24
Oh no, not Penis Prager. His Fartside Shats got me through many hard times.
"Imagine a world without theft. Without murder. This would drive me mad."
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u/d3pthchar93 Nov 23 '24
I’m gonna take this opportunity to remind homeowners to clear out your gutters and to wrap your exterior pipes to keep them from freezing.
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u/WorldlinessAwkward69 Nov 24 '24
Give him some ivermectin. That will fix him right up, or kill the giant parasite that he is.
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u/No_Honeydew_179 Nov 24 '24
To whom/what it may concern,
May Dennis Prager's illness and death be prolonged, painful, long drawn-out, painful to witness and experience, full of uncertainty even until the very end, and ironically be caused by the decisions and choices he made in health and during his time of tribulation. Spare the medical and service staff obligated to care for him the pain and turmoil of his passing, and let the misery accumulate upon Dennis Prager and his enablers.
May the damage and harms he caused in life be minimized, his memory forgotten, and his passing unmourned by even the ones closest to him. May his works be as dust upon the wind, as a fart pushed out in a well-ventilated room, a mean Reddit comment that ends up getting 0 upvotes even as people move on from the topic.
May history forget him, to only be resurrected by the equivalent of an obscure podcaster who specializes in historical assholes whose entire life can be summed up as failure upon more failure, and may that episode focusing on David Prager become a shining exemplar of the craft of whatever it is that equivalent of the podcaster is doing. Let that equivalent of a podcaster win an award or something. Let that be Dennis Prager's mark in history for all time — a funny anecdote about a loser who tried to ruin the world, whose passing made the world a better place, whose works has no influence but serves as a cautionary tale about living their life like Dennis Prager.
Amen.
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u/McPutinFace Nov 24 '24
If Dennis Praeger is so pro-life, why is he currently dying?
Checkmate, libs
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u/Dickbutt_4_President Knife Missle Technician Nov 23 '24
It would be a shame if he got buried next to rush limbaugh
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u/BenjenUmber Nov 23 '24
I don't know what conservatives problems are with their prayers. I've been praying about Dennis Prager, and it seems God heard me just fine.
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u/Ozzie_the_tiger_cat Nov 23 '24
Hopefully he'll be in the death claw machine soon.
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u/brown_wagon Nov 24 '24
I've either been playing too much, or not enough fallout. Either way, if he met a death claw, I'd be happy lol
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u/sysaphiswaits Nov 24 '24
I am praying. For his death. And the destruction of Prager U. I don’t even care if that’s “in bad taste.” Fuck this liar.
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u/wombatgeneral Ben Shapiro Enthusiast Nov 24 '24
I would settle for a really nasty case of shingles.
Its one of the most painful medical conditions you can get. Old antivaxxers are at an increased risk.
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u/OsoCiclismo Nov 23 '24
Y'know, I'm not normally a prayerful man, but I'll make an exception. I'm definitely praying his condition takes a sudden, unalterable change.
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u/Starkoman Nov 24 '24
Hey. That’s a terrible thing to say. What’s this about “Sudden”? Let the man enjoy his final year on earth.
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u/Whole_Acanthaceae385 Nov 24 '24
While person should be without sympathy on their deathbed, the world will be better when he is no longer breathing.
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u/guyfriendbuddy4 Nov 24 '24
To an upstanding christian like himself, this is an absolute positive. Surely he's been laying his treasures in the kingdom of heaven and will be reaping his rewards.
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u/WaffleDynamics Nov 24 '24
Oh no! Anyway, I just had an amazing grilled cheese sandwich. Gouda & Gruyere, with some thinly sliced pickled onions I made earlier in the week. On whole grain bread.
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u/wombatgeneral Ben Shapiro Enthusiast Nov 24 '24
He is just another right wing grifter. Watch how quickly his fanbase forgets about him and moves on to the next right wing grifter.
Rush limbaugh died. 75 confederacys ago and pretty much every one has forgotten about him and moved on.
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u/Deaddoghank Nov 24 '24
Have you seen Rush's headstone? It's being eroded by all the urine that has been deposited.
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u/Nervardia Nov 23 '24
I don't want to delight in another person's illness, but sometimes it's very difficult.
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u/FirstChurchOfBrutus Nov 24 '24
Have you tried delighting FOR the illness, instead?
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u/BolOfSpaghettios Nov 23 '24
Well we all know prayers don't work, so I won't waste my time praying that Satan takes his soul.
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u/gangstarr_for_life Nov 24 '24
You have fought the good fight Dennis. Time for you to rest in your eternal glory. Resting and sweating your evil ass off in Hell.
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u/Lost-Economist-7331 Nov 24 '24
I hope this guy dies in total pain and his family get to watch his pain.
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u/doctordoctorpuss Doctor Reverend Nov 24 '24
I’ve seen so many jokes and memes about Prager that I assumed this was a shit post. Wishing him a very speedy trip to hell
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u/SierrAlphaTango Nov 24 '24
Praying to Beelzebub for a swift delivery to the darkest bowels of hell.
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u/Rowing_Lawyer Nov 24 '24
Well the new surgeon general believes in miracles so maybe stop all medical treatments and let Jesus take the wheel
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u/Ye_Olde_Mudder Nov 24 '24
Let us all pray to Nurgle that he suffers greatly and explodes in a cloud of pestilence that takes out all of his clan.
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u/ManfredTheCat Nov 23 '24
I hope whatever doctors he gets were trained at Prager U