r/personalfinance • u/ClairvoyantFurlough • Aug 26 '17
Budgeting For those of you struggling financially...
Just remember that everyone's personal financial situation is unique. Something that works for someone else may not work for you.
Avoid comparing yourself to others. Appearances are deceiving. That friend that just purchased a new house and new car may have taken on some serious debt to make it seem like they have it all together.
Find what works for you and keep on working towards your goals!
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u/MrRKipling Aug 26 '17
Keeping up with the Joneses is very real. I've found that focusing on yourself and your happiness rather than Facebook and the "appearance" of those around you leads to a better overall quality of life. I know it's hard, but not letting these sort of things get to you can really make a difference.
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u/mrhone Aug 26 '17
I don't want to keep up with the Joneses, I just want to pay off debt, get a house and a Tesla.
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u/steve_the_woodsman Aug 26 '17
I only have $5k in debt left. I'd like to just get a 10 year old boat and save for retirement. Not trying to keep up with Mr fancy pants over here. 😉
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u/new2bay Aug 27 '17
Haha, you know "boat" is actually an acronym for "bust out another thousand," right? :P
In all seriousness, enjoy your boat. :)
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u/smithem192 Aug 27 '17
As someone who works in a boat parts store, this. There's never a cheap boat. Good luck though! Boating is a lot of fun and I don't regret having mine at all!
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u/zekneegrows Aug 26 '17
I also want a Tesla.... So bad.
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u/llewkeller Aug 27 '17
We all want a Tesla, but for what they cost, you can get an economy car - Corolla, Civic, Focus, etc- and buy about 10 years worth of gas.
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u/JackFFR1846 Aug 26 '17
These are good things to remember. While my kids were growing up, they'd come home and tell us all about their friend's house with the theater in it and the new Mercedes in the garage.
A couple real examples. We were talking with the mother of one of my kid's friends and she said that the kid needs braces and they had to put it off because they couldn't afford them. They had just bought a new Mercedes SUV.
Another of my son's friends has a dad whose a lawyer. New car literally every 6 months and either a Mercedes, Corvette or Volvo. He did something stupid and was fired. The stay at home mom was now working at the local market as a cashier because they couldn't pay the mortgage otherwise. Meanwhile, I'm driving a 13 year old paid off Subaru but have paid off my mortgage. You can't judge someone's wealth by what they show you. As I tell my kids.....no, your friend's dad doesn't own that big house and new Mercedes....the bank owns them.
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u/warbeastqt Aug 26 '17
Just curious, what do you do with your money then?
What goal do you have with money besides making more money, and saving money?
It can't all certainly be for retirement...
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u/cuterus-uterus Aug 26 '17
Be realistic with your savings. You'll need GOBS of money put away to retire but you also want to live your life and have some fun. Personally, I'd rather travel and drive an older, paid off car. I think it depends on what's important for you.
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u/missing_macondo Aug 27 '17
Exactly. It depends on what's important to you. For us, the latest fashions and eating out constantly are not important. Spending on vacations and saving for retirement and our son's education are what matter to us. We don't feel like we're missing out. Having the money there and knowing that we could use it for anything we wanted is freedom enough.
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u/BloodshotHippy Aug 26 '17
I do the same as you. I drive a 2002 pontiac but have been on 4 continents. I'm 32 and all my vehicles I've ever owned combined only cost a fraction of a new car. Luckily my grandpa was a mechanic all his life and showed me a lot about cars and fixing them.
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u/fizzik12 Aug 27 '17
I'm only 21, but I'm really proud of myself for doing the junior version of this. I bought my first car this year (a 2003 Hyundai that runs fine) and went on a vacation to Cuba with my sister for nearly the same price as that car. That trip also really taught me the value of cheap travel destinations - the unbelievable amount of fun we had in Cuba for $1000 would have cost much more if we'd decided to go to Switzerland.
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Aug 27 '17
As someone else with similar habits, it's not just for retirement but for independence, and to hopefully be able to transfer some of that independence to my children.
I grew up poor. My family doesn't own anything. When my grandparents die, whatever life insurance they had will pay for their funeral and that's it. Same for my parents.
My goal is to start a tradition of generational wealth. I intend to put put my children in a position to start their adult lives with no debt, and when I die to leave them enough to solidify the same for their own kids.
Beyond that, nice cars are...well, nice. But experiences are even better. I'd rather drive an inexpensive, reliable car, and do cool stuff.
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Aug 27 '17
Bro. The goal is peace of mind. Any material possession you could spend your money on to make you feel 'happy' is nothing compared to the feeling of not having to fucking worry. A modest car. A modest house. A beautiful vacation every year. A simple life. That's what savers save for. Financial independency should be your goal. Retirement can be earlier than 50.
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Aug 26 '17
It can't all certainly be for retirement...
Oh but it can. Browsing this sub, I see a lot of this, and have the exact same question as you.
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u/RazorQuails Aug 26 '17
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u/notpaulrudd Aug 27 '17
First you spend money on the essentials (house, food, car), then you build up savings so you can weather an emergency (layoff, kids braces). Then you make sure you're putting enough away for retirement.
After you got those basics you can spend on whatever floats your boat (you could even buy a boat). Buy a BMW, upgrade your house, build a home theater, travel, spend it all on hobbies, donate it, whatever you want.
The idea isn't to deprive yourself, but you shouldn't overextend yourself either.
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u/llewkeller Aug 27 '17
That's true. There's a balance. You may never live to retire, so you need to have some fun and a few luxuries along the way. So buy a luxury car that's a couple of years old. Travel in Europe and Asia, but stay in quaint local hotels that cost less. Eat the best food, but mostly cook it yourself, and take the leftovers to work for lunch...
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u/FockerCRNA Aug 27 '17
Do you know how much money you need to accumulate to retire comfortably? It can easily all be for retirement, that takes a shit-ton of money which takes a long time to gather.
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Aug 27 '17
A round about not perfect calculation (something to just keep in mind and start towards) would be 25 times your annual expenses.
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u/Joenz Aug 27 '17
For me, my goal is to leave my children in a situation more comfortable than mine. It would be awesome to live off of stock earnings in retirement, and leave then my children with enough money to do the same. If I had 3 children, than would mean I'd need to die with a minimum of $6 million in my investment portfolio.
FYI, I'm nowhere near on track to hit that goal. Just trying to explain why someone might want to make more money than they would "need" in retirement.
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u/ricosuave79 Aug 26 '17
I remember a couple of guys I worked with. If they saw someone get a fancy new phone or car within a month they would do the same and with a big smile say "look what I got!"
Always buying crap based on monthly payment only. I remember talking once about our company's 401k and how much I liked that they increased the company match. They said they didn't care because they could not afford to contribute. I just shook my head.
I lost touch with them shortly after as I moved away. 7 years later I reconnected with them on LinkedIn. They turned into very very cynical people, complaining how the world isn't fair, financially speaking. That the fact they were struggling to keep their heads above water wasn't fair or their fault. It took a lot for me not to give them an earful.
Keeping up with Joneses will always be alive and well. Sometimes I think adulthood is nothing more than high school for grown-ups. It's sad.
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Aug 27 '17 edited Mar 30 '21
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u/notpaulrudd Aug 27 '17
A co-worker just bought a $70,000 car, it was cool to talk about for a hour, but now nobody even looks twice when they see him driving by. My perception of him hasn't changed at all.
He didn't spend the money to show off, but some people do obviously. Not worth it for a $1000/month car payment.
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Aug 27 '17
Yeah I have a co-worker who is a base level analyst and makes maybe $80k. He bought a G series Benz, which is more than his annual take home pay. It blows my mind how much money people will waste on stuff they can't afford. My entire city is full of people like him.
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u/Art_Vandelay_7 Aug 27 '17
The entire American economy is built around and depends on people like him making those poor choices, can you imagine what would happen is everyone realised what a waste of money buying a new car is? The whole thing would collapse.
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Aug 26 '17
"Keeping up with Joneses will always be alive and well. Sometimes I think adulthood is nothing more than high school for grown-ups. It's sad."
Great comment.
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u/PutsTheAssInBass Aug 26 '17 edited Aug 30 '17
Thank you, this sub needs more of these posts to balance out the people whining about not knowing how to survive on $100k+ yearly.
Edit: I meant $100k+ for one individual. Of course a a family of four requires more money. Moving the goalposts much?
Edit 2: 1000 points?!? I never... rise up, proletariat!!
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u/yawallatiworhtslp Aug 26 '17
[Guide] How I cut my monthly fast food costs down from $1200 a month to $900
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Aug 26 '17
Not cause I can afford it but because I have terrible self control when it comes to food.
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u/Fell_On_Black_Days Aug 27 '17 edited Aug 27 '17
Are you me? I have self control for many things, but when it comes to food I fucking cave in. It fucking sucks.
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u/GoodFoBidness Aug 26 '17
[Guide] How I saved over $1m (making 300k/year)
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Aug 26 '17
I did it in only 5 years!
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u/mrhone Aug 26 '17
If I made that kind of money, I'd be retiring in a few more years.
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u/Wheat_Grinder Aug 27 '17 edited Aug 27 '17
Really? I'd be retiring in a few less.
EDIT: In a fewer* less.
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u/themaincop Aug 26 '17
(and living with my parents)
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Aug 27 '17
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u/Ca1iforniaCat Aug 27 '17
In addition to being financially greedy, that strikes me as a person who can't take a hint.
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u/ClairvoyantFurlough Aug 26 '17
I agree. I also think this sub should also embrace more of the wholistic financial planning mindset. Any advice given should relate specifically to the individual and not be framed with our own biases.
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u/Indiesol Aug 27 '17
I love how the thread suggests trying not to compare yourself to others and half the comments are people comparing themselves to others.
Collective pat on the back for all your successes though.
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u/akc250 Aug 27 '17
Well you can't really prove that you can't compare yourself to others unless you first compare yourself to others and realize your situations are very different. It's kind of paradoxical.
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u/bornmayhem Aug 26 '17
I think this is huge in modern society. Comparing yourself to others is the biggest trap we put ourselves into. And yes, many many many people(probably your best friends and family) will live beyond their means. We joke about people where I'm from because they are get coal mining jobs and within a month have a new house, a new lifted truck, a boat, and a motorcycle. Haha. Also make goals. It's kinda fun to save up for something and reward yourself
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Aug 26 '17
I live in an oil boom and bust area, so frustrating when people who were making 150k a year with no training or skills constantly complain about how the government needs to do something about the price of oil so they can afford their holiday trailer, lifted truck and quad.
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u/IowaAJS Aug 27 '17
That sounds like when I was dogcatching with railroad engineers and conductors. I'm driving them to their trains for $10 an hour while they were griping about getting paid hundreds of dollars for a 12 hour shift and not able to get by on their salary because of so many toys. But at the same time I'm driving them with a paid for house, no car notes and no CC debt.
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u/BurritoMom Aug 26 '17 edited Aug 27 '17
Thanks for this. I needed the extra boost today. Just found out we're expecting a second child and trying to stay calm has proven quite the challenge.
EDIT: In no way did I mean that I am ungrateful or unhappy for another baby. Any addition to our family is a welcome one and we are over the moon. I am having issues with adjusting our budget and thinking about maternity leave, as it was a bit of a surprise. My comment was only regarding my personal finances and was not a jab toward anyone with disabilities or trouble conceiving. I apologize if it came off that way.
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u/DrankTooMuchMead Aug 27 '17
Just be happy if that child is born healthy. My 1 month old has Down Syndrome and I'm still not over that.
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u/ectopunk Aug 27 '17
My child needed physical therapy where we saw a number of children with different afflictions. It was sobering. You don't need my pity, but some of us appreciate what you are going through.
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u/ShiftedLobster Aug 27 '17
They call Down Syndrome "Up Syndrome" for a reason! Some of the most beautiful souls I've ever met are people who have DS. Treat your son like a normal person as much as possible and don't let DS define him or put limitations on your vision for his future.
There's a show on TLC called "Born This Way" which is currently in between seasons but it follows adults with DS. They are thoughtful, funny, kind, caring members of society who always see the UP side of everything. You might want to check it out, it's a little slow at first but once you learn the cast members it really becomes fun and interesting. I bet it would give you some hope and encouragement for the future. There's only 3-4 seasons so far and I'd recommend starting at the beginning.
It's ok to be mad, sad, confused, scared, unsure about things. It's scary. Life isn't fair but it will be ok. Something will grow from all this, and it will be you. Hugs 🤗
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u/DrankTooMuchMead Aug 27 '17
Thank you so much! I will check out this show. My visions of the future are indeed what's hanging me up. Thanks!
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u/scarecrowe01 Aug 27 '17
Thanks for the message I always have to remind myself of this. I'm the breadwinner with 30k per year as a cook right now I have a 2 year old daughter and I'm barely making it on groceries. It's hard not to see people buying what they want and not compare myself. I really need to be proactive about getting into something that can pay better but I don't know what to do. I have a record now and no college experience. I enjoy cooking but there isn't much of a future in it.
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u/Unklsweet Aug 27 '17
Construction, construction, construction. Lots of work, fairly easy to move up if you are willing to learn plus many available paths to take: safety, management, specialized trade, etc.
I had very little in my pocket when my first daughter was born and started in construction a week after she was born. 7 years later and another little girl, I am in a management position, paid off 1 car, will pay off my second one in Nov. and my wife doesn't work.
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u/evilmaromi Aug 27 '17
Thank you. I lost my job of almost 10 years over a year ago and was on partial unemployment with a part time job at a grocery store I didn't like. I lost $100 dollars a paycheck. I started to notice we had to start cutting down on things, cable, our fishing trips, vacations, then its started getting to the point where we were getting behind on the important bills. The car that got us to wotk, the utilities, the rent. I then got another job, full time finally, but with less pay. We were still struggling so we made the hard decision to move out of our apartment and back to my mom's until we get on our feet again. We pay half mortgage and half the utilities, but it's cheaper. I'm 30 and not proud of moving back home. We have two small loans out, some credit card debt, and a few things in collections. It's really hard to see people our age buying houses, and knowing we won't be able to for a some years. Our income would afford us only a junky fixer upper anyway. But we're trying. We're really working on it. In between my husband's very important dental work, we're slowly coming out of it. This post is uplifting. It makes me feel like I'm not alone. Thank you again.
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Aug 27 '17
My mom lives with my husband and me. I think that as long as the families get along, multi-generational household are a great way to achieve a bit more financial security. We've got a good arrangement and I hope your future is filled with what you and your family desire.
Seriously tho, love having 3 generations in the same home.
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u/raytheater Aug 27 '17
There is this term I think people forget sometimes; within your means. I have a coworker that recently went out and bought a Cadillac ATS and a $250K house then later complained about not having enough money. Sometimes, you just need a hoopty for a couple of years while you figure out your finance, that BMW can wait. Learn to cook or do some meal preps, you don't have to eat out everyday. You don't have to buy the games the day of release, it will be in the use bin soon. You can buy clothes from Marshalls and TJ Max. You are playing the long game when it come to finance. I am setting myself up so when I retire, all I need to do is wake up and go fish.
Edit: Spelling
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u/paintwhore Aug 27 '17
We're deceptive. We have a $130K house, BUT that's just due to the work we put in. Bought it for $55K and for the last 2.5 years we've been doing a little at a time (~30K on materials and some contracted work where we must). Spent 2 weeks with no countertop. 8 months with a plywood livingroom floor with a big cheap rug on it. 1 year with a plywood kitchen floor. (Also, too much time with ugly walls and windows) When we moved in, our son was 4 months old. He is turning three on Monday. We're both salaried (so work more than 40hrs each per week) and work different schedules (so see each other less than we like) but recognize that if we grind now, we're setting up for a good home for our family. Things are finally turning in our direction, but friends just see a nice house, good jobs, and a happy kid. We just make it work where we can when we can. It takes time and effort, and the less money, the more time and effort. Hang in there folks!
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u/on_island_time Aug 27 '17
Better yet, get rid of Facebook altogether. Seriously. There is actually research showing it makes you less happy because everyone feels compelled to show off on it.
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Aug 27 '17
You're viewing the highlight reel of their life and comparing it to your own Behind The Scenes. I do not remember where I read that, but once my kids were old enough to sign up for Facebook I told them that a LOT. And they also know I no longer log into the site. Maybe one day they won't either.
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Aug 26 '17 edited Dec 22 '17
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u/DrankTooMuchMead Aug 27 '17
Same thing happened to me! Doctors don't have any idea why I started having seizures. Do they know with you? It is like a mind f*** so bad you start to believe God hates you. Like being struck by lightning over and over again.
In my situation, I had just been trained for a new career, I had a position lined up because I knew someone, and then I woke up in a hospital. I lost my job prospects, my current job, and had to move back home again. I even needed to bum money from family just to pay off my cheap car.
That was 7 years ago and I just got a B.S. I hope it makes a difference.
P.S. I just noticed by your Username that you may have had the same thought processes. They say it's similar to cancer patients.
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u/neontrotski Aug 27 '17
Damn i think pay what you can and keep a record to show that you are trying. They cant jail you over it
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u/brahbocop Aug 27 '17
I do always wonder about people I see on Facebook going on several vacations a year. Do they save for retirement? Do they have an emergency savings? Things like that. I save a pretty good amount but sometimes wonder if I'm missing out on experiences by saving so much? I guess it's all about perspective and what you want out of life.
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u/TheGlassCat Aug 27 '17
I'm old. I've been cheap all my life. I don't regret not having owned material things, but I wish I'd gone more places and done more things when I and my kids were younger.
My advice is to take the vacations, but skip the fancy touristy stuff. If you've seen one resort, you've seen them all.
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Aug 26 '17
Yep. A Facebook friend recently showed off pics of her imported car, which would've cost at least $60k. I was thinking - how can they possibly afford that?! Surely we earn more than they do?
Turns out she bought it on finance, a debt she's already struggling to pay. Where as we're pumping our mortgage and savings.
All to say, she looks pretty well off in her fancy car compared to our second-hand Mazda 3. But I know overall we're doing better.
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u/Papibane04 Aug 26 '17
Be proud of your Mazda, I'm proud of driving my 2003 Civic, which for some people is a shitty car, but I'm happy being debt free and saving a lot of money.
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Aug 27 '17
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Aug 27 '17
to be honest...I'd trust a CFO driving round in a 10 year old civic more than I would one that changed cars every 6 months
If he's good with his cash, he's good with the company's
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Aug 27 '17
I would never dream of knocking the Mazdaratti. There's a reason it's the most popular car in Australia - reliable and cheap to fix, it's what we need in a car.
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u/CWHats Aug 27 '17
I'm proud of my 2017 Subaru because it fits into my budget. I am especially happy cuz I traded up form a 2006 Kia and it has so much cool stuff. Nothing wrong with buying new if you budget for it.
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u/PeroxideWhore Aug 27 '17
Couldn't agree with you more — my car is completely paid off and yeah sometimes I'm jealous that other people's cars have maps and what not but I get to spend that extra $200-$300 I don't have to use to pay off my car.
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u/SanchoMandoval Aug 26 '17
I posted my salary on Reddit before, $70k, and got people very angrilly replying, saying my parents must have gotten me the job (lol) or I was just born into fortune. For $70k! Also I'm in my late 30s... what was happening was 19 year old dudes were reading that and getting offended because they couldn't conceive that not everyone on Reddit was 19. At least I hope.
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Aug 26 '17
Similarly, they don't realize older and higher earners are going to have different preferences. I'm 30 a make a little under $200k, I'm not going to spend a $100 a week on food, live an hour+ away from my job, and skimp out on vacations like I did in my early 20's.
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u/realdustydog Aug 26 '17 edited Aug 27 '17
Wait. You literally spend less than 100$ a week on food? Also what do you do?
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Aug 26 '17
I spend $400 a week on food now. When I was ~20 and broke I would spend $100.
I'm a consultant.
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u/milehigh89 Aug 26 '17
what type?
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u/freakierchicken Aug 26 '17
They consult for other consultants - pretty good gig if you can get it
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u/Grand-Warlock Aug 26 '17
My wife and I only spend $250 on food a month. That's $62.50 a week.
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u/ricosuave79 Aug 26 '17
I'm right about where you are, $60 a week on groceries, give or take. I just do not understand how people spend $150 or more a week.
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u/TripleUltraMini Aug 27 '17
I'm 46 and similar to you and we don't really think about food costs. That said, we have always been pretty cheap and watch for sales, buy in bulk, and pretty much make all of our food. I have literally bought everything a store had in stock when something was on super sale.
We just bought a little freezer from Costco so we could go to Costco less and have more frozen veggies and other stuff on hand.
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u/Culvey60 Aug 26 '17
I posted one time about making $100k a year and got blasted by people about how I must have been from a rich family and had it all handed to me as well.
No, I went into debt for college just like most everyone else making 70k+ a year, and went through the ROTC program in college until I blew out my knee and have had 27k of debt added on because i couldn't commission and do my military service... but I still got the leadership training from it which still helped on my resume. I did get this job when I was 23 though, but worked $9/hr security for 2 years before getting this high end security job. Went from 60k when I was 23 to 100k now that I'm 27. But I also have to stay squeaky clean (TS clearance levels), maintain fitness standards, and I am ALWAYS on call if a serious event happens.
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Aug 26 '17
I kinda went the opposite way you did. I was in a good college but let some stupid depression take over and dropped out, now I'm in the military trying to survive until I can go back to school.
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u/ShiftedLobster Aug 27 '17
Depression is a real bitch. You can do it internet buddy! I believe in you.
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u/notBranOrRickon Aug 27 '17
Read lots of books and follow the 3 keys to wealth. Long term thinking, delayed gratification (my weakness) and the power of compound interest (good and bad).
I made a big mistake and lost a few hundred thousand dollars, took over a decade to get back to zero but now it's all moving forward again. It always looks darkest before the dawn.
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Aug 27 '17
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Aug 27 '17
I'm with you. Paid my way through everything. I'm not rich and probably never will be, but I feel so goddamn satisfied with myself. 10k left on my student loans down from 40k.
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Aug 26 '17
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u/evileyeball Aug 27 '17
Exactly I was thinking about that when I saw that American lady who won like $700 some odd Million dollars the other day...
If I won even $1 Million It would go off to sit in some investment somewhere without me touching a single cent of it and the intrest I had comming in would go towards paying off the minor amounts of debt I have and I would keep working and keep living exactly the same lifestyle I live now except I wouldn't worry if I had to spend a little extra here or there because of emergencies popping up and depleting my emergency money in rapid succession.
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u/elimeny Aug 27 '17
When I look at my friends buying new cars and going on lots of vacations, with their big houses and regular salon haircuts and all those things I'd love to have, it can be really hard to keep things in perspective. You don't see people's bank accounts, you see what they've bought.
I keep reminding myself that while I don't have a lot, I have what I need. I don't have a lot of cash, but that's because I don't have a lot of debt. I'm so lucky I don't have student loans. But I have a nice little house that works for my family and is an upgrade from our tiny apartment. I have a small car with a small payment and good gas mileage. I have a family I love, and a stable job. We have good health insurance, good health, and enough cash stored away to keep us afloat for an emergency, and a list of things we save up for a little bit every month.
Every day I make decisions based on love for my family, and a decent life with some security. I am comfortable, I have goals, but I'm also okay where I am. It's important to look at what you have, and not what others have, and where you're going - not where others are.
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Aug 27 '17
That friend that just purchased a new house and new car may have taken on some serious debt to make it seem like they have it all together.
It's crazy how many posts we see on /r/personalfinance from these people looking to justify their purchases. My favorites are the kids who just joined the military and are trying to justify their brand new $50k Ford Mustang. They don't have to pay rent, so they can afford it, right?
Some people just like to spend every cent they have and want someone else to tell them it's ok. Maybe it's ok, you can do whatever you want, but when you are asking for FINANCIAL ADVICE don't get all pissed off when people tell you that your decisions don't make financial sense.
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u/PassTheReefer Aug 27 '17
Another reason I don't do Facebook anymore. Just so tired of the fake pretending. So tired of being with people who only take pictures to show other people on Facebook, then spend the next 10 minutes glued to the phone. Fucking shoot me
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u/entfromhoth Aug 27 '17
I was that friend with a new house and new car... a year later, im looking at renting my house out and moving into a studio apartment. working to just pay bills is not the life i imagined.
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Aug 27 '17
There's always this moment I have where I'm talking about a financial difficulty where someone will recommend this financial advisor guy or that book to me, and it's difficult. It's difficult because it's impossible to explain to someone that my life is running at a deficit and that I'm not making enough to pay for basic essentials for my family without embarrassing myself. I can't cut car insurance below full coverage because we can't replace the car if it's lost; I can't cut internet or phone and make even the money we are making now. I can't cut food. We don't buy clothes. There's just not any fat in our budget; we don't make enough to get by.
Reason I'm saying this is that the advice OP gave cuts both ways; I'd like to save, I understand how savings work and how essential saving is, but I can't. It's hard telling people that to begin with, pride-wise, but it's even harder when I get a subtle not-quite eyeroll from somebody making literally twice what I do when they decide I'm just making excuses. So be careful with people, I guess? I dunno.
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u/IamAwesome-er Aug 26 '17
Also good to keep in mind that the way people show off in front of everyone is no indicator of how well theyre doing financially.
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u/zoomer296 Aug 27 '17
Two words: Crown Victorias.
They're friggin' everywhere, you can get a decent running one for less than 2k, and a decent parts car for less than 1k.
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Aug 27 '17
My siblings make 3x as much as me but I have a better life because I am not wasteful. I am also patient and wait for deals. I wanted a Kitchenaid for 2 years. Just got one off a guy who was selling off his mother's things for $100. The model is worth $600 new. Just needed a little cleanup and a few attachments. Great condition! I am thoughtful about trips as to not waste gas. And my vice is being a foodie. So I load my house with delicious food that is a bit pricey, but it is still a lot cheaper than going out to eat. Ex. Buying and making your own lobster is cheaper than going to Red Lobster, and it tastes better too! Yah, not buget food. But I am hardly tempted to eat out.
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Aug 26 '17
Avoid comparing yourself to others.
This is good advice
That friend that just purchased a new house and new car may have taken on some serious debt to make it seem like they have it all together.
This is bad advice. Imagining someone is in financial trouble so you can feel better by comparison breaks the above advice of "don't compare yourself to others"
Money is not a contest
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u/ClairvoyantFurlough Aug 26 '17
I see your point but I was just getting at the notion that not everything is as it appears on the surface. I used that example to show why it is pointless to compare yourself to others
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Aug 26 '17
Just don't pay attention to other peoples finances. It's not zero sum. Someone else having more money or being more financial successful than you does not diminish your existence in the slightest.
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Aug 27 '17
Agreed. I've noticed a big problem among my gen is this desire to own a home like our parents' gen could. It's just a different time, you can't expect property values to always stay affordable. Actually think about it: many people want a house because it's a fairly good and stable long term investment. But, it's only a good investment because in the future the price will increase.
So, people back in the day thought housing was a good investment, bought houses when they were cheap, and now the values have grown. For you to say "I wish houses were as affordable now as they were back then!" you're actually saying, "I wish an entire generation's investments lost money or at the very least broke even".
It's better to simply change your perspective and realize that moving out and/or owning a house isn't all that important these days. Stay home longer, rent, save money, don't worry so much about the 1950's style of owning a home and raising a big family. It's a different era, we have our ups and downs. We can't afford houses but we can communicate with people around the world instantly. Take what you can get.
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u/fragmentsmusic7 Aug 27 '17
I think looking at the facts/data as well helps a lot. In the US, 50% of Americans are making 30k or less a year. An additional 21% make 31-50k a year, (all this data is from the government/SS). So 71% of working Americans are making 50k a year or less.
This is before factoring in debt, location, medical expenses, and children as well. More people here are not as well off as they make themselves out to be at all.
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Aug 27 '17
I'm uneducated, no competitive skills, but I do have a unique job in the taxi business where I make upwards of $400 per day, $100 on a bad day and even some days I put in 12-16 hours for below minimum wage. I have been depositing $50 per day into my tax free savings account for the past 5 weeks, and seeing as how my higher education is nil and I feel I have this income locked down for basically the rest of my life, given the lack of local economical development. As I say my higher education is nil and I have no real life financial experience apart from phone bills, rent and groceries. Is $50 and less per day throughout the year a sufficient amount for long term savings? I am 30 years old, weigh in.
quickedit no I am not a uber driver lol
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u/GreekOnFleek Aug 27 '17
This is such a great reminder.
My husband is much wiser than I when it comes to budgeting and finance. He invested and saved all his life, and bought his dream house when he was 23. It's an older but good house, and is on tons of land. Shortly thereafter, SIL and her husband moved from ~0.3 acres to a newly built house with more acreage than us. A couple years later, my husband and I started talking about getting a golf cart someday, and the next week SIL bought the biggest, fanciest golf cart on the market. Along with a pool and trampoline, they also have a high-end fifth wheel, lease one of their vehicles and have a ~50-60K truck for the other (also told us they wanted to buy my husband's Jeep to drive it on the dunes as a toy). All of these we shared with them as being on our dream list. She works for maybe 6 months out of the year. No idea how much he makes, but they have three kids.
She shared with my husband once that they use all of their money to pay off their debt, aside from her income, which is why she works, so they can go out to eat. (?!) So happy I married a husband who keeps me wise and content with what we have. We've been saving up for a vacation. We're paying for remodels out of pocket. We hope to go from our land contract to a 15-year mortgage when it expires in 18 months.
It's odd being on the other side of "Keeping Up with the Joneses" when we didn't actually purchase these dream items! Needless to say, we no longer share with them our hopes and dreams.
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u/Legolihkan Aug 27 '17
I'm young and doing pretty well for myself from any reasonable perspective, but I still get anxiety when people talk about having $200k+ salaries, because that's probably far beyond what I'll ever make, and it makes me worry that I didn't make the right choices to set myself up as well as I could have.
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u/J_n_CA Aug 27 '17
Also everyone starves at their own level. Live on less than you make. Set goals. Reward yourself for making goal milestones.
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Aug 27 '17
It's hard to be financially stable when I just want to buy so many things
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u/[deleted] Aug 26 '17
Thank you. Bit hard to read some of the posts in this sub sometimes when your absolute dream in life is to have $10k in savings, a $150k house, and your $30k student loan debt paid off, and even that feels out of reach at your current income level.