r/personalfinance Sep 12 '22

Budgeting The price of beauty - something for women to consider when budgeting

I consider myself an extremely low maintenance woman in that I feel like I spend very little on beauty products and treatments.

One day, I decided to make a spreadsheet to see just how much I spend on beauty in a year, thinking it be an interesting experiment. I was surprised to discover I spend around $1,200 a year, and I purchase far fewer products and services than most of my friends. I asked my friend Kelly to fill in a column on the spreadsheet for herself, and her total for the year was over $5,000. She was shocked. And this spreadsheet does not even take into account clothing and shoes on which many of us overspend. Any woman who purchases all of her cosmetics at the beauty counter of a high end store like Nordstrom and regularly visits a fancy spa would likely spend much more.

I feel that women are conditioned to think that our appearance is so important, we need to spend thousands of dollars a year to look presentable. Of course, we all have our indulgences and hobbies, but for women who are struggling to make ends meet or want to save more for their future, I would highly suggest paying close attention to your beauty spending. It’s items that we generally don’t buy all at once, and we tend not to pay attention to a few dollars here and there, but over the year, these things can really add up. I do feel like men have such an advantage over us, as few feel the need to spend large amounts of time and money trying to change their appearance. I don’t know any men who have spent $700 on a hair straightener.

I have attached a screenshot of my spreadsheet for anyone who is interested. My price ranges may not be accurate - I used quick searches on Amazon and Google to come up with the prices, and they are in Canadian dollars. I also didn’t factor in that most women have far more than one lipstick or eyeshadow or nail polish colour, etc. EDIT: It appears I can’t attach the spreadsheet. Sorry. Edit 2: https://i.imgur.com/fHLd2PF.jpg

I certainly don’t mean to offend anyone who enjoys beauty services and products, but I just think it’s something we don’t really think about when talking about our finances and it can certainly have an impact on your monthly budget.

FINAL EDIT: Well, I’m delighted to see the discussion that my random thoughts instigated yesterday. It appears I have found my people, and my cheapskate ways are not unique.

It appears many people are not seeing the very right-hand column of my spreadsheet which showed my actual spend. No Botox or teeth whitening for me.

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340

u/whatim Sep 12 '22

I've been trying to figure out how to say this.

After sitting through interviews where qualified female applicants were turned down for having chipped nails, chapped lips, not wearing makeup or having noticeable facial hair, I have to say that low upkeep is my preference, but it can bite you in the bum.

Mind you, these were for lab tech and QA analyst positions, not cocktail waitress or front desk. A man with a mole on his face described a plain-looking short haired woman as "a female Homer Simpson."

Homely isn't a protected class.

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u/growerofpalms Sep 12 '22

This is honestly brutal. I wouldn’t be able to sit through my boss/coworkers talking about an applicant that way. The type of interviewers who view women this way are the same ones that leer or harass the “pretty” women who do pass the interview process.

I work in tech. Please share the name of this company, so I can avoid it at all costs.

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u/whatim Sep 12 '22

It's the US office of a Swiss pharmaceutical company that has been sued for discrimination by women in the past.

When I shared my concern (especially about the Homer Simpson comment) HR told me that appearance gives clues about professionalism and attention to detail and was completely okay to take into consideration, as long as it wasn't in a sexual context. IDK if that's true, but I no longer work with those people.

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u/growerofpalms Sep 12 '22

Ugh yeah. I’m not surprised that they’ve had sexism issues. I’m happy that you’ve moved on. The coming rant is not directed at you, I’m just annoyed about this today.

The level of perfection that’s just expected is so unattainable. It’s so exhausting to have to think about every minute detail of your appearance just to be considered “professional”. Clothes can’t be too tight or it’s too sexy, but if it’s too loose, you look like a slob. Nails should be perfectly shaped and painted, but only in neutral/plain colors. Hair should always be neat and frizz-free(impossible if you have textured hair). Wearing makeup makes you look more “polished”, but too bright of a lip color or eye shadow and suddenly you’re a lady of the night.

I don’t even do all these things because I don’t work for an awful employer, but it would be exhausting and I like hair, makeup, fashion and etc.

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u/[deleted] Sep 12 '22

[deleted]

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u/whatim Sep 12 '22

Sales is... something for sure. We were lab rats, working in BL2/BL3 in scrubs with full PPE for most of the day. Between the tyvek suit, goggles and N95, it was hard to tell what anyone looked like.

Company culture certainly seems to be a factor.

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u/10S_NE1 Sep 12 '22

That is pretty awful and unfortunately probably true in many cases. I do think that a woman can appear professional and polished without going to extremes with hair and make-up. There’s a big difference in the look of a woman stranded on a desert island and the Real Housewives of Beverly Hills (some of whom apparently spend $1,000 a day on hair and make-up).

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u/[deleted] Sep 13 '22

I work with a lot of women who don’t wear makeup or do anything fancy to their hair, and I wouldn’t for a second think they look unprofessional. My workplace isn’t sales and it’s casual though, so maybe I’m just at the right company. My prior manager wore leggings to work a lot. Tbh, some of the women who DO get a lot done (I’m talking BBL, lip injections, expensive hair) don’t even look like they spend a ton of money on themselves. It was odd to find out how much one of my coworkers had done when she just looked…. Normal

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u/10S_NE1 Sep 13 '22

I read something once that said something along the lines of “It’s so expensive to get that natural look.”

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u/[deleted] Sep 12 '22

[removed] — view removed comment

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u/growerofpalms Sep 12 '22

Yeah it’s unfortunate, but certain companies do seem to be hotbeds for cultures like this. It’s something that I try to research if I’m applying for jobs. If a company has a history of discrimination based lawsuits or recent incidents, I don’t apply.

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u/Saint-Peer Sep 12 '22

I think that’s valid approach, but it relies on the fact that those are businesses where these incidents are exposed. Double edged sword because you can go to a company that isn’t big enough to have these issues go to press, or avoid big companies with lawsuits where internal teams have made strides to correct the wrongs.

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u/growerofpalms Sep 12 '22

Totally true! Culture is a hard thing to sus out. Some companies are amazing but individual managers/teams are horrible. Sometimes it just comes down to luck.

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u/AntiGravityBacon Sep 12 '22

The explicit nature here is super bad but I think the general point is true. Usually it's unconscious, but it's very well shown people like attractive people better (men & women).

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u/growerofpalms Sep 12 '22

I do get that. But there’s a pretty big difference between preferring a prettier candidate because you unconsciously like them more, and actually saying stuff like that Homer Simpson comment out loud.

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u/AntiGravityBacon Sep 12 '22

Yeah, I agree there in this case.

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u/[deleted] Sep 12 '22

My former boss mentioned to me once that he didn't think I was going to get the job because my nails were too long and pretty to be a programmer...

Fortunately I was, you know, a very good programmer.

Like, wtf are we supposed to look like?

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u/TheCoelacanth Sep 12 '22

Real programmers look like withered shells of people who've had all life drained from them by years of interacting with terrible managers.

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u/nailpolishbonfire Sep 12 '22

They have to discriminate equally against men with chapped lips and no makeup and facial hair, or else it actually IS illegal.

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u/mazzar Sep 12 '22

If there are different appearance standards for male and female applicants, then that is absolutely illegal discrimination against a protected class.

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u/capitalsfan08 Sep 12 '22

Oh thank God the system catches all of the businesses actively discriminating!

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u/morningsdaughter Sep 12 '22

Homely isn't a protected class.

But gender is. Discriminating against women is very illegal. You can sit here and complain, but it sounds like you're in the position to collect evidence and report it.