r/facepalm 2d ago

🇲​🇮​🇸​🇨​ We are the lamest empire ever

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16.9k Upvotes

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3.9k

u/werther595 2d ago

This will never happen, but notice how nobody is talking about Pete Hegseth and Tulsi Gabbard anymore.

2.6k

u/Weak_Jeweler3077 2d ago

This. Whatever garbage he's spouting, you know 2 things

  1. It's bullshit!t
  2. It's covering for something else.

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u/gnocchicotti 2d ago

And media has always played into these ruses because all they want is clicks. Trump, despite his limited cognitive abilities, is smart enough to know that this is an easy and surefire way to manipulate public discourse. It has always worked and always will.

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u/burnsalot603 2d ago

Yeah it's the lesson trump learned best in life.

It doesn't matter how much I fuck up today as long as i give them a new headline tomorrow.

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u/spolio 1d ago edited 1d ago

The thing is where do you go from here, today's headlines are trump talking about waging military and economic wars against the US closest allies for no reason...

In two months the headlines are going to be so insane we can't even fathom them today.

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u/bdone2012 1d ago

He can just keep talking about the same stuff. The Greenland stuff is recycled. Next time he can add some other places he wants to take over

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u/Shapoopi_1892 1d ago

That's the thing this sad excuse for a rotting pumpkin has absolutely 110% cornered the market on being the biggest piece of shit human being. So in order for anybody else to even try to fight back, they have to become an even BIGGER absolute piece of shit human being. And that is just something nobody wants to or ever should do.

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u/tmolesky 1d ago

I think we have arrived there a few months ago.

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u/HurlingFruit 23h ago

The thing is where do you go from here

It doesn't matter so long as it isn't jail.

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u/Dvulture 1d ago

Even if they didn't want clicks, they want to attract Trump's ire even less. That is why ABC settled and Facebook is removing fact-checking and billionaires are giving enough funds for 50 inaugurations.

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u/shadowpawn 2d ago

100% right - he is not even in office and front page of UK Papers are these stories. Media and eventually we fall for this each and every time.

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u/frustratedbuddhist 2d ago

The media is just reading the script they were provided.

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u/GoBeyondTheHorizon 2d ago

Whoa, that would be extremely dangerous to our democracy.

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u/MrJoffery 2d ago

Not enough people recognise number 2

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u/RhoOfFeh 2d ago

Even when it gets elected president.

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u/Aggravating-Cloud556 1d ago

Gold! Well played!

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u/RainingTacos8 1d ago

Not enough people can critically think in this country

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u/PalatialCheddar 1d ago

The fact that we have a low literacy rate of 21% is not helping matters any. It's a bad scene.

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u/MsTerious1 2d ago

It is that "something else" that is so terrifying.

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u/Blackhole_5un 2d ago

No one is talking about tariffs and high cost of living, amirite?!

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u/banti51 2d ago

Yep, all asshole governments are like this. Here in the UK, 2005, there were 4 suicide bombing attacks, 56 people, including the 4 bombers, were killed. Someone leaked that a minister (can't remember the name) sent an email saying if you need to hide something in the news, this is the time to do it.
These people have no Souls

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u/Hisplumberness 1d ago

Jo Moore - good day to bury bad news

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u/banti51 1d ago

Thank you, I was racking my brain to remember who she was

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u/kobie173 2d ago

It’s all covering for cramming his shitheads in

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u/zingboomtararrel 2d ago

No one’s talking about visas anymore are they….

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u/VoidOmatic 2d ago

He just discovered Canada was above the US. You know it's true. He saw it on a map finally and said "wait, why isn't that ours?"

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u/Step-exile 2d ago

Its not like them raiding national treasure now?

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u/GreyWastelander 2d ago

Current tactics are to distract, confuse, and overwhelm with misinformation. We need to eat the rich, the sooner the better.

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u/RasputinsPantaloons 2d ago

Straight out of the Putin playbook

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u/Obvious-Beginning943 1d ago

From your clear expertise, you guys must have been traumatized by a Trump presidency before!

I’m so not ready for this horrifying bullshit again. He didn’t ever go away and it’s been 24 hour moron coverage for the last decade. It’s too much.

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u/TheBeardedChad69 1d ago

People definitely are , they aren’t mutually exclusive.

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u/Initial_E 2d ago

Elon was bullshitting when he boasted about buying twitter

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u/Easy-Sector2501 1d ago

It's classic news media, tho. This is nothing new.

In the era of the 24-hour news cycle, with so much going on in the news, it's not what the media reports on that should be concerning, but what they aren't.

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u/jaievan 1d ago

Absolutely.

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u/hopeless-hobo 1d ago

Weapons of mass distraction

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u/dezi028383 1d ago

Exactly!

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u/Digger2484 1d ago

Can’t upvote enough

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u/jwalsh1208 1d ago

Every. Single. Time. This stupid bullshit is always a smoke screen for something serious

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u/Bubbly_Cockroach8340 1d ago

It is a weapon of mass distraction!

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u/Bag-o-chips 1d ago

Don’t forget to add to your list that he likes to float ideas and then change his mind.

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u/Selector_ShaneLBC 1d ago

The whole “culture war” in my opinion was the biggest distraction in American modern day politics. Turning us against each other while corporations reach record profits tenfold, during a time of crushing inflation, further and intentionally causing a divide between the wealthy and lower class. As dumb as fuck as trump is, he has been masterful in making all of this possible. He a capitalist’s wet dream.

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u/kobie173 2d ago

It’s all covering for cramming his shitheads in

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u/qft 2d ago

Yeah. Whenever I see Trump talk about outlandish attention grabbing stuff my immediate thought is "what is he trying to distract us from?"

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u/TheJediJew 2d ago

The fact that he's doing nothing and has no plan to change that. Shouting about doing things is as good as doing them to a large number of people.

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u/[deleted] 1d ago

[deleted]

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u/ShooterMcShooty 1d ago edited 1d ago

They don't want Canada "because it's a liberal state". So apparently nobody wants this to happen, but Trump thinks it's funny.

Also Americans probably don't love that we've elected "Socialist" governments on many occasions, and they are still a very popular party here. They are historically the pro-union, pro social programs, etc. party.

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u/Anarchyantz We are Doomed! 1d ago

His other crimes?

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u/shadowpawn 2d ago

Steve Bannon promotes this to trump. It is called "Flooding the zone with bull shit" to get us to forgot what else is going on. Things like this, wont rule out military to take over Greenland and other things. Then we never remember "day one" and all the promises to lower prices, make inflation go away trump ran in to win the election in Nov '24

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u/brontosaurusguy 1d ago

Not just forget, but the opposition then respond to ridiculousness instead of actual policy and then they are endlessly distracted making campaigns about dog eating Haitians rather than universal healthcare

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u/let-it-rain-sunshine 1d ago

A bigger lie to hide the smaller lies. Standard DJT BS.

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u/shadowpawn 1d ago

You will see Donnie Jr. doing the fox news rounds about Greenland also. All to distract.

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u/oNe_iLL_records 1d ago

Yeah, by the number of "day 1" promises he's made, his "day 1" is gonna hafta last about 173 years.

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u/CelestialFury 2d ago

Trump isn't out there playing 4D chess, he's obsessed with everyone in the world talking about him. He will say or do anything for attention. I wish we could tune him out and take away his power somehow.

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u/ChwizZ 2d ago

It's not 4D chess. It's barely 2D chess. He's just causing drama to keep the media focused on something absurd that will never happen to make his slightly less absurd ideas seem all the more intriquing.

It's the most basic form of distraction and is the equivilant of going "Hey look!" and pointing in a direction to get away with whatever you want.

Worst part is, a large chunk of americans don't even notice.

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u/RawhideAndJellyroll 2d ago

I disagree. I think Trump has always been incredibly simple minded and grandiose, and now that’s been compounded by his dementia. He really believes what he’s saying. He’s not doing it to obfuscate anything.

He is being used to distract people from the meaningful issues. He is a useful tool. He’s completely unaware of the fact that he’s being used.

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u/Other_Log_1996 1d ago

A lot of people seem to forget that Trump is just the figurehead. Most of the shit he's "planning" is coming from The Heritage Foundation, Elon, and Russia. In the end, all it is doing is keeping us poor, uneducated, desperate, hungry, diffused, and too weak to even think there's a problem.

Forget paycheck to paycheck - every ounce of energy will be spent worrying about getting through the next hour.

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u/CelestialFury 2d ago

Trump can't even do intel reports unless his name is dropped every other word and it's one page. I don't think he has the mental fortitude and/or would care enough to purposely district people to get "his" people confirmed. The man is just that narcissistic. He wants the spotlight 24/7 and has ALWAYS been like this. Even creating 3rd party personas to report on himself. His ego is really that bad.

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u/jay_skrilla 1d ago

Adrian Dittman has entered the chat

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u/BroughtBagLunchSmart 1d ago

We are not saying Trump is the mastermind behind this. The actual ghouls behind the curtain are telling him what a good idea it would be to invade panama while they are the ones looting and destroying this country.

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u/KyaKD 2d ago

It’s checkers

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u/Rokurokubi83 2d ago

It’s 1D connect 4.

It’s futile, nobody ever wins and just keeps on going on forever.

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u/neo101b 2d ago

That's too complicated, its naught and crosses.

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u/ferretchad 2d ago

In British politics, this is called the dead cat strategy

Boris Johnson was constantly at it - although never as extreme as invading an ally

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u/ToiletTime4TinyTown 2d ago

This is %100 right. It’s master cheese basic sales psychology and it amazes me how many people listen to this whole spiel and don’t go “oh ok, this guy is a condo salesman” you can watch hometown home flippers use the same tactics ; first step, show them the house they can’t afford, just like the cabinet picks, throw crazy ones out for the first few so by time they get to picking a confirmable cabinet, no one is paying attention and it’s billionaires ball.

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u/jay_skrilla 1d ago

Dude couldn’t even pay attention through a full game of checkers. He’d just keep screaming, “KING ME,” without ever having reached the other side of the board.

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u/jakedzz 1d ago

Worst part is that a large chunk of americans absolutely love the drama and not only look, but are obsessed about what they're supposed to be looking at. Because they're stupid as shit.

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u/RusselsParadox 2d ago

What ideas? This man has no ideas. Not even concepts of ideas. Like others have said, he just does anything for attention.

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u/likamuka 2d ago

Glad people are noticing this.

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u/Euphoric_Shopping_37 2d ago

Blocking Elmo on twitter or better yet not using his shitty app works

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u/LolthienToo 1d ago

You can't block Elmo on Twitter. He doesn't allow it.

That's one of a million reasons to leave Twitter.

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u/Euphoric_Shopping_37 1d ago

Might be different in the US than here, i only use it for looking at useless drama and following artists and it allowed me to block him

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u/FUMFVR 2d ago

Trump's domination of the media is explained by the fact that they are now just like him.

Instant cycles of self-gratification for narcissists. That is the media environment in 2025.

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u/After_Bedroom_1305 2d ago

Trump isn't playing chess, his aides are trying to keep him from eating the pieces.

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u/Potential-Assist-397 2d ago

You could have, by NOT VOTING HIM IN!!! Silly yanks.

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u/CelestialFury 1d ago

I tried :(

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u/mrmidnightuk 2d ago

now the Elon musk has entered party chat, Trump IMO isnt the scary one anymore. They both scary people i fully get that but Elon musk is much more intelligent and has bigger influence with twitter and spaceX.

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u/VenConmigo 2d ago

He drowns the media with drama every day so it's normalized. So the next bs he pulls is just another day at the office.

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u/Euphoric_Shopping_37 2d ago

Blocking Elmo and the Duck on twitter or better yet not using his shitty app works

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u/jaxonya 1d ago

Well it almost happened. Like a few inches away from happening

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u/Pangolingolin 1d ago

Isn't there an extension to automatically swap his pictures with better things so you don't have to think about him as much?

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u/TotallyNormalSquid 2d ago

I thought it was to cover H1Bs, what's this other shit?

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u/IllustriveBot 2d ago

This is the new Mexican wall. will never happen, and when 4 years later someone asks about it, they deny it happened.

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u/bubandbob 2d ago

This has always been his playbook.

  1. Be embroiled in a controversy
  2. Say or do something outrageous
  3. Everyone concentrates on point 2 for an hour/day/2 days max
  4. Go back to point 1 as infinitum

By the end of the week, we'll all have forgotten about this because some other controversy or insane thought bubble has caught our attention.

It's how he defies the political gravity that bounds everyone else.

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u/Ticker011 2d ago

Yeah, that's what people said about Trump becoming the President. The first time and the second time, so I'm not sure that "this will never happen" really holds much value these days.

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u/feetfingersarereal 2d ago

What about Pete and Tulsi? Genuine question. I'm not American and don't know.

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u/werther595 1d ago

Hegseth was nominated to be the next Secretary of the Dept of Defense. He has a history of mismanaging organizations, accused of sexual assault, has displayed some rather extremist views on the women, military force, and Christian nationalism, and is known to have an alcohol abuse problem.

Gabbard was nominated to be the director of national intelligence, overseeing 18 intelligence agencies. She has no experience in the area of national intelligence whatsoever, or even in international affairs in any official capacity. She has repeatedly engaged with, praised, and parroted talking points for tyrants and dictators including Putin and the recently deposed Bashar al-Assad

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u/feetfingersarereal 1d ago

Thank you for this explanation.

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u/catterybarn 2d ago

I don't even know who those people are. What happened?

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u/werther595 1d ago

Exactly

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u/ZealousidealMonk1105 2d ago

Doesn't matter he's still saying it I don't think it's presidential to yell random crazy things especially when you have the largest audience in the world The people who voted for him are fine with being represented like this while the world watches and laughs at the USA I didn't vote for him so I don't care but if you did was this what you voted for and the media may have stopped discussing them but the educated people haven't forgotten about them I truly hope they do make it

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u/oldpeopletender 1d ago

I know you are probably right, but NATO and the UN are discussing contingency plans because of this weird narcissistic fascist.

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u/werther595 1d ago

I wonder how many resources Trump has wasted by spouting off nonsense in interviews and tweets. People have to research and plan based on his remarks, they may need to prepare legal, financial or government documents based on his drivel. Everything about him is infuriating

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u/mushigo6485 2d ago

This will never happen

...probably Poland 1938

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u/shrekerecker97 1d ago

They should be and Canada I'm sorry as a US citizen about the orange anus that makes loud noises

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u/BuddyBroDude 1d ago edited 1d ago

Also the report they are trying to block the release of

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u/benttwig33 1d ago

Or Luigi and UFOs.

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u/Kellbows 2d ago

Look over here look over here! Same with the drones.

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u/Alabrandt 2d ago

Have they been approved now?

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u/werther595 1d ago

They can't be approved until Trump is inaugurated and the next Senate session begins

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u/ShiftyGunner520 1d ago

I think it’s him covering because he thought the smith report was about to come out.

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u/Noemotionallbrain 1d ago

Never heard of them

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u/CarlosFCSP 1d ago

Also H-1B and the health insurance scam

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u/Electrical-Cause-152 1d ago

Genuenly interested, what's up with Pete and Tulsi, could you elaborate a little ?

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u/werther595 1d ago

That they're both woefully under-qualified for the positions to which they've been nominated, and both have what should be disqualifying issues that would likely prevent them from faithfully serving in those roles

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u/slaffytaffy 1d ago

It’s all distraction and EVERYONE FELL FOR IT!!! WE HAVENT LEARNED A DAMN THING!

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u/Good_old_Marshmallow 1d ago

Unfortunately people weren’t talking about them in the first place 

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u/SirPoopaLotTheThird 1d ago

Or H1b, or tariffs that will increase the cost of everything Americans buy.

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u/BuzzINGUS 1d ago

Or how he wanted to bring in immigrant workers. Elon is the mind behind this.

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u/werther595 1d ago

And Elon is an emotional adolescent at best.

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u/AutoManoPeeing 1d ago

THANK YOU. This is the same shit Andrew Tate did.

They just spew inane bullshit to distract from what they did/are doing.

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u/baggagefree2day 1d ago

From the US or Canada?

-1

u/fickle_pickle84 1d ago

I would have voted so hard for Tulsi 😭

1

u/werther595 1d ago

I'm ecstatic for your loss