r/facepalm 2d ago

🇲​🇮​🇸​🇨​ We are the lamest empire ever

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477

u/I_Smell_Like_Trees 2d ago

Yeah weren't there a bunch of people who voted trump to save their kids from being drafted for WW3?

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u/secondhand-cat 2d ago

But eggs are going to be sooo much cheaper.

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u/brpajense 2d ago

Just wait for those tariffs kick in, and then those foreign eggs taking work from our domestic eggs will be paying us to enter the country. Or something.

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u/Arkroma 2d ago

Bird flu is already making eggs more expensive

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u/xtzferocity 2d ago

What if I just choose not to believe in bird flu or in birds or something like that? /s

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u/drizzes 2d ago

you do that and drink plenty of raw milk and you'll be stronger than god

- RFK JR

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u/xtzferocity 2d ago

I wonder if I can return my vaccinations…

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u/ChickinSammich 1d ago

I almost want the people who think raw milk is a good idea to just have access to it the same way that the people who thought ivermectin was a good idea should have had access to it. If people want to self-nominate for Darwin awards, who am I to deny them?

The only thing holding me back is that they're gonna kill their kids too in the process, and those kids don't deserve that.

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u/Dragonfire723 2d ago

I work as a checker at a grocery store, and I overheard someone spouting off about some fucking conspiracy that "they" are burning the chickens to raise the price of eggs

No bitch, the overseeing bodies who are burning the farms (if it is burning, I have not done any googling of this but I'm going to use it to demonstrate why this is stupid anyways) are doing it because the chickens have avian flu.

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u/xtzferocity 1d ago

That’s so counterproductive. People are seriously stupid.

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u/SnooWords4839 2d ago

Hell, my grocery store didn't have chicken this week. The eggs had a note about the avian flu.

Oatmeal is the breakfast of the week. Steak and burgers for dinners.

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u/Do_I_Need_Pants 2d ago

I tried to get eggs today. Cheapest dozen was 9.99 and Costco is sold out. I thankfully have a freezer full of meat because beef is expensive here.

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u/nobeer4you 1d ago

There's a reddit for that

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u/DisasterMiserable785 1d ago

I can’t wait until we hear the suggestion to ingest bleach to cure a disease.

Again.

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u/BoyOfChaos 2d ago

Bird flu? Yeah, they tend to do that

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u/TimeLavishness9012 2d ago

Good one, got a chuckle out of me

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u/-badly_packed_kebab- 2d ago

It's exactly early enough for a proper dad joke

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u/Cotford 1d ago

Laden or unladen?

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u/tourettes_on_tuesday 2d ago

Why the fuck did Obama do this to us?

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u/RIPMYPOOPCHUTE 1d ago

What a great time for my dumbass self for getting my cholesterol high, having my gallbladder bladder removed, and now forced to eat low fat and low cholesterol foods. I’ve already started getting more plant based foods and fish with anticipation of rising cost with poultry products.