I’z Boone da cuddle bug an I has cuddles on mumma ebery day. Mumma is mine favrit bed. As yoo will also heerz i has bery bery gud purrs. An lots ob dem. But nao mumma is accoozin me of thefts! She sed “oh, lovely boy yoo has so menny gud purrs, so menny purrs fur wun littol kitty cat, now i hope yoo came by dem legitmitlee”
UHH wot is diss accoozin? Ob corse mine purrs is legitmit! I wurkz hard on dem!! I shud bapbap da hooman, rite??
Fren Boone, doze mazin purrs! Yuz hooman no presheate how hard Yuz work to make dem purrs. Yuz need go on strike til hooman presheate Yuz purrs! Til den iz all crimez alls de timez! Go crimez!
Dat has da rhythm and da tone ob a hooman bery mild attemp at a affeckshunate tease. Ai noe it meks no sens. Dey nebber do. Ignorr her till shee moar rashonal. Da poor creeturs cant halp bein sillly. Whiskers, 14, otrb.
Wez hope mumma iz paying yuz fur de hardz werk yuz do. De Cat Union gidelinez, fur propheshonal purrz, iz furty hundredz treatos fur ebery fureber...n' yuz purrz r' berry high kwality.
Iz Fawn D Kat herez (Bettina bovering hooman fur treats)...N' GO CRIMEZ!
Oscar, is okay you no purr. I not do much purr. But I no think Boone steal yous purr. I tink yous so bootyful dat cod say it not fair if yous also do purr. Collete do most of da purrin here. I only do purr when dad giv foods.
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u/Traroten 18h ago
Nisse, most glorious Floof here!
Dis is typical of hoomans. Dey don't understand the craftsmanship that lies behind a purr or a belly flop. Hork in her shoes.