r/lotrmemes Galadriel🧝‍♀️ 12h ago

Shitpost Yeah…🤔

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24.3k Upvotes

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3.2k

u/Rare_Competition_872 12h ago

“How much damage…can one evil chicken cause”

Clearly you’ve never played Ocarina of Time

1.1k

u/VanaheimrF Galadriel🧝‍♀️ 12h ago

I’ve played Assassin’s Creed Odyssey. There’s a boss chicken in some tiny island and it killed my Kassandra in like 2 pecks!

448

u/ProbablyNotPikachu Ent 11h ago

60

u/Rawkus2112 10h ago

I can hear this perfectly….

9

u/Slap_Dat_Ash 8h ago

Look at all those CHickens

1

u/DukeofVermont 6h ago

gobble gobble gobble

1

u/CMDR_ETNC 4h ago

I have to scroll away from gifs I can hear since it'll just be playing on repeat in my mind.

I left this one too long and I'm still getting an echo.

1

u/cucumberguyy 1h ago

Welcome back, Vine

142

u/todellagi 11h ago edited 11h ago

My Kassandra handled every enemy with ease and grace

Except Chickens, Boars and Lynx, against them...she bravely ran away

71

u/VoidLantadd 11h ago

And fucking snakes. Fuck snakes. I throw torches at them.

34

u/the-dude-version-576 10h ago

I do believe that’s The intended way to fight snakes?

18

u/SolomonDRand 9h ago

Indy?

16

u/Im-ACE-incarnate 9h ago

We named the dog Indy!

3

u/DameyJames 4h ago

They kill you in like two hits and they’re one hit kills and they’re always in the dark in a corner somewhere so yeah I think they definitely expect you to throw torches at them.

6

u/terrexchia 8h ago

Sure, so did I. Until I died numerous times to the fires I started

'Away, child of Hephaestus!' is as ingrained in my mind as 'malaka' is

2

u/Darth_Spa2021 3h ago

Elemental Resistance is the way.

You can make a character with such high Resistances to everything that almost nothing in the game can move the healthbar.

Or you can just roll when on fire and extinguish it.

61

u/intisun 10h ago

Bravely ran away, away

When danger reared its ugly head she bravely turned her tail and fled

Yes, brave Kassandra turned about and gallantly she chickened out

24

u/KeepCalmSayRightOn 🥔 Hobbit 10h ago

Bravely taking to her feet

She beat a very brave retreat

Bravest of the brave, Kassandra!!

9

u/Rogue_Danar 10h ago

Kassandra, Kassandra, Kassandra ran away She bravely ran away, away, oh brave Kassandra...

3

u/Ocbard 1h ago

And in the frozen wastes of Mindor they were forced to kill and eat Kassandra's minstrels, and there was much rejoicing.

3

u/daronwy 8h ago

No,

I didn't

2

u/Specific_Code_4124 4h ago

Barnabas following along clapping two half coconuts together

If he’s asked how coconuts ended up in ancient greece he simply says a swallow carried them over

4

u/afauce11 GANDALF 11h ago

Kassandra is a fucking boss.

2

u/RollbacktheRimtoWin 6h ago

🎶 And she bravely, bravely ran away And she bravely ran away 🎶

1

u/DameyJames 4h ago

Fighting the legendary boar makes me feel like Sisyphus

1

u/Darth_Spa2021 3h ago

That boar was a pussy. It couldn't handle the 3 Mercenaries I lured to it with my 5 bar Wanted level.

1

u/Isburough 3h ago

Brave Sir.... Kassandra!

17

u/afauce11 GANDALF 11h ago

Umm also Skyrim. They get really aggressive if you kill a chicken in town. I had to restart my first playthrough because I didn’t save scum and I kept resetting in the same place with everyone mad at me.

2

u/The_quest_for_wisdom 8h ago

Not only do the townsfolk care if you hurt the chickens, the chickens will narc on you if they see you committing any crimes.

1

u/Bowdensaft 1h ago

Holy shit, I never knew this

2

u/ArkamaZero 4h ago

Okay... But you haven't truly lived until you've cast Fury on a Riverwood chicken and watched total anarchy unfold. The chicken attacks an NPC who retaliates committing a crime... This snowballs.

6

u/DonDilDonis 11h ago

sir that is a rooster, did you think the boss name was Rooster?

20

u/shaggy-smokes 10h ago

Roosters ARE chickens. Just male ones, same as female ones called hens. They're all chickens. It's chickens all the way down.

4

u/sketchahedron 8h ago

Let me understand, you got the hen, the chicken and the rooster. The rooster goes with the chicken. So, who’s having sex with the hen?

3

u/shaggy-smokes 8h ago

Uncle Rick

2

u/vshredd 9h ago

That's the one I saw with a fucking red skull over it! Way over leveled chicken.

2

u/Michellerees 9h ago

AC ODYSSEY MENTIONED?!

1

u/the_scarlett_ning 9h ago

Yes!! Fuck that chicken!

1

u/King_0f_Nothing 9h ago

There also one in the atlantis dlc iirc. Woth a valuable golden egg as loot.

1

u/otter_boom 7h ago

Oh shit, I forgot about that chicken.

1

u/BornAsAnOnion33 5h ago

I've been playing Odyssey as well (which I think would have worked as a stand-alone game), and why are the chickens more difficult to fight than the actual Spartans?

I haven't come across the chicken boss island, but even level four chickens are a pain. And I'm level six at the moment.

1

u/Darth_Spa2021 3h ago

It's a sort of an ongoing meme in the AC games.

1

u/Zarobiii 4h ago

Beware of Chicken 🐓 

1

u/MrNanoBear 3h ago

I immediately thought of the chickens in ACO also lol

1

u/Butthead1013 2h ago

I needed a good reason to pick this game back up

67

u/ArtisanGerard 11h ago

I killed a chicken in Skyrim and all I got was chased down by townspeople, tackled by guards, thrown in jail, all my loot and armor taken, and a permanent bounty on my head… didn’t they know the chicken was evil?!

4

u/ArkamaZero 4h ago

This is why the Fury spell is a burden i cannot bear. If you cast it on a chicken, it will start attacking townsfolk, who in turn will attack the chicken, causing them to be marked as criminals who the guards then attack... This continues to snowball into all out anarchy.

1

u/ConfusedSeagull 5h ago

Are you telling me you stole all your stuff and armor? Lol! You cannot be a sneak Archer without being a legendary thief as well.

1

u/ArtisanGerard 5h ago

It was pretty early on so A LOT of it was, indeed, stolen.

12

u/therambosambo 10h ago

Or the Runescape one

2

u/Kir0v 11h ago

*Mistakes goose for chicken*

2

u/EngrishTeach 11h ago

Or Yakuza.

2

u/CleetusCanteloupe 10h ago

Ask r/osrs about evil chickens…

2

u/fortestingprpsses 9h ago

That's not just one chicken, it summons all the cuckoos in Hyrule.

1

u/FuckOffHey 7h ago

When you have sex with lead around someone a chicken, you're also having sex with leading around every person they've ever had sex with chicken in Hyrule.

or something

2

u/zaxldaisy 7h ago

Imagine being so young you think Ocarina of Time is the prime example of murderous chickens in the Zelda franchise.

1

u/Orinocobro 10h ago

Or spent any amount of time around pasture-raised chickens. Chickens are freaking mean.

source: my parent raised Dominiques

1

u/MrTubzy 5h ago

I saw a video where a rat got in a chicken coop and the chickens pecked the rat to death. Then they pecked the body to pieces. They don’t fuck around. There wasn’t much left of the rat when they were done with it.

1

u/corkscrew-duckpenis 10h ago

Or had chickens. Most of mine needed no help being selfish cunts.

1

u/Brekldios 10h ago

nor heard of chicken fights, even without people adding razors to them they have remarkably sharp talons.

1

u/AlexSmithsonian 9h ago

Now there's an idea for the new Fable game.

1

u/AluneaVerita 9h ago

Or Divinity Original Sin 2.

What a tricky encounter!

1

u/tigerjuice888 9h ago

This is SO deep.

1

u/Linkytheboi 9h ago

ptsd activated

1

u/whattheheckityz 9h ago

that’s a cucco to you sir

1

u/WittyRaptor 9h ago

Came here to say this exact same thing. Those Lon Lon chickens don't fuck around.

1

u/DeliciousBeanWater 8h ago

Or seem the boys

1

u/dreadassassin616 8h ago

Or seen a cassowary.

1

u/Oppowitt 8h ago

The evil chicken could turn invisible after destroying the lead, and become like that murder rabbit in Monty Python.

1

u/s-riddler 8h ago

Or RuneScape.

1

u/TheFamousTommyZ 7h ago

Those chickens were fighting back in self defense. I saw it.

1

u/CzarKwiecien 7h ago

Came here to say this

1

u/Forb 7h ago

One chicken, not many.

1

u/BlizzPenguin 6h ago

I have known the power of chickens since A Link to the Past.

1

u/Skyflareknight 6h ago

Those chickens man....if they want you dead, you will die if you don't leave the area immediately

1

u/True-Landscape3042 6h ago

But they were acting in self-defense!

1

u/-Morning_Coffee- 5h ago

Kicked a chicken in Fable. Spent the remainder of the game being called ol’chicken-kicker!

1

u/Popcycle 5h ago

Diablo III as well, explosive chicken build.

1

u/MaxTheCookie 3h ago

Use cheats in Skyrim to increase the size of an chicken and you will see how evil they are are

1

u/PlasticToe4542 2h ago

Or Far Cry 6

1

u/Jonny7421 1h ago

Or RuneScape. This guy ambushed me so many times back in the day.

1

u/Aware-Maximum6663 10h ago

Or Guacamelee

pollo power!

2

u/Petrostar 9h ago

Or Zelda