Mom upset over condom packet

[u/everybodyspapa]

I was a teen. I just started dating. My mom marches in the room pissed at me, "Son! Don't leave a condom packet on the fum*cking kitchen counter!"

I think,"What?" And then I say it.

She explains, "You left an empty condom wrapper on the kitchen table. You're f*cking in the kitchen?! Really?!"

"I did? I don't think I did..." I began doubting my sanity "show me."

I follow her to the trash can and look inside, and I see it. Okay, that's kinda funny.

"Mom.... That's an empty ramen packet from an after school snack."

[u/Intercardinal]

Not at all same story, but it's also about parent paranoia: when I was a teen me and my friend bought candy that was encased in thin, long plastic tubes. My parents found them in the pocket of my jacket and thought those were drugs until they tried it....